About My Source Life

Welcome to My Source Life.

This is my little piece of the internet where I speak openly and honestly about the struggles of being a stay at home parent.

For me, it has been a road filled with conflicting feelings and emotions. Having my previous identity torn down, not knowing where I fit in this new reality, and uncertain of what I really wanted for myself.

Of course its not the same for every stay at home parent, but I think we all feel some of the same things, and could benefit from hearing each others stories.

I know it builds me back up a little, when another mom shares that she’s going through the same things.

So I go deep into the pieces of my experience in hopes that sharing them will make another mom feel less alone, more seen, and more understood.

Finding Purpose through Mindful Living 

Its hard to slow down and be present when things are moving so fast around you.

You are trying so hard to keep up with everything and everyone, thats its sometimes hard to distinguish which you even really care about.

Figuring it out has to be an intentional effort, and its the way that I work to make sure I’m taking in all the magic being a stay at home parent offers.

So I invite you to join me in slowing down so you can focus on the happiness that’s already present in your life and learn how to elevate and sustain that happiness, no matter what comes your way.

We do this by focusing on our:

• Physical well-being
• Mental well-being
• Living in alignment with our personal morality
• Honoring our responsibility in caring for the earth

With a steady focus and realistic pace, I offer you encouragement to shift towards shedding the things that are causing you harm, then turning inward to find out what your deepest wishes for your life are, and working toward creating a life of self-fulfilling joy.

About Natalie Freed

After having a successful career in the TV industry, I soon chose to transition to the role of a full-time stay-at-home mom, and suddenly began questioning my purpose and self worth. 

Like most first-time moms, I was so focused on the baby part of it that I didn’t pause to think about what it would be like for me to experience such a major identity shift.

In my imagination, I was completely fulfilled when my children came. The idea of spending blissful days with my baby and caring for our home and family sounded perfect.

Don’t get me wrong, having a child is one of the most incredible, amazing, awe-inspiring experiences of my life and I am so incredibly grateful for it. 

But there was another side of motherhood for me. A secret side that I didn’t want anyone to know about. The part that made me feel like I was wrong and should be ashamed for having such feelings.

They looked something like this:

• Worrying what my former colleagues thought of my decision to be home. Did they think I was giving up, I couldn’t hack it, or had they already forgotten about me?
• Worrying that I needed to prove to my husband that I was ‘earning my keep’ and able to justify every dollar I spent, that he brought in from his job. 

Honestly, It was demeaning and embarrassing.

This not only led to my plummeting self-esteem, but also to a feeling of resentment towards my husband.

Having a second child just intensified everything. It was depressing to be experiencing the greatest joys of my life as I realized my dreams of motherhood while simultaneously questioning my validity in the eyes of the world and myself.

But it was being so lost that motivated me to look for solutions:

• I looked to other stay-at-home moms to find out how they were handling it all.
• I searched books for answers on finding my purpose. 
• I started to eat healthier, and incorporated juicing, exercise and yoga. 
• I became vegan and pursued a more mindful life. 
• I looked inward to find and follow my personal bliss.

With a renewed hope for my future happiness, I took a leap of faith and enrolled myself in the Natural Gourmet Institute for Health and Wellness (NGI)- a cooking school based on whole foods and plant-based cooking.

It turned out to be a transformative experience. I not only gained an education on how to cook in a healthy way for myself and my family, but it restored a great deal of my self-confidence. I was starting to get into a groove, and was seeing hope for a more fulfilled me.

But just a few months after graduating from NGI, I found myself falling apart….again.

We had just moved our family back to California after spending 7 years in New York.  I was thrilled to be going back home where both of our families lived. With grandmas and aunts and uncles now available, we finally had babysitters and some free time.

We settled into new schools, a new house, and a new neighborhood. On the surface life was pretty good… but I wasn’t.

How was I going to have a rewarding marriage, be a great mom, offer a healthy life for my family, and pursue my own personal life passions while feeling so NOT okay?

I was once again faced with digging in and trying to work it out, but this time was different because I had something to work with. 

My experiences in New York had left me with a basic blueprint and I decided to return to the source- to those things that had brought me out of my funk the first time.

As unlikely as it may sound, my journey towards peace and happiness came from one of the most energetic and intense cities in the world. 

What I know is that it doesn’t matter where you are, if you are not ok inside it will suck wherever you go. I also know that you can be happy wherever you are too.

I started My Source Life in order to fulfill my desire to create a healthier, happier, more meaningful life for myself and my family, and to share the tools and tips I gather with anyone else who is in search of the same things.

Welcome to my journey.

Thank you for being here.